Chapter
4, focusing on understanding behavior, has a lengthy section about motivation.
Method #5 in chapter 11 describes ways of increasing your level of motivation.
You should read those sections along with this one. I believe most of the time
you need to be intensely motivated to make difficult changes in your life. That probably means working on only one or two changes at a time.
We
have all known highly motivated people; they are eager, driven, determined,
confident, single-minded, and obsessed. Strong motives take us in many
directions: saints and crooks, stars and repeated failures, love and hate,
awe-inspiring and disgusting. Think of
Some
of our drives may be innate--the natural condition of the species. But,
certainly, many motives are learned, so they can be changed. For instance,
Adler (1951) thought children quickly learned they were inferior and spent a
lifetime striving for superiority. Field Theory says that environmental forces
and the ways we have learned to view our situations determine our incentives,
goals, and intentions. Social Learning Theory suggests that motivation depends
on observing how to get the rewards we want in the environment and our faith in
our ability (self-efficacy) to do it. Attribution theory states that achievers
have learned that they are able to succeed, that hard work increases the
chances of success, that learning about themselves
facilitates success, and that succeeding is enjoyable and worthwhile. If you
want to succeed but 626t1916g haven't learned those things, you can if you want
to.
All
of us are pushed in many directions by many powerful physiological,
social-cultural, and psychological needs. Most of us yearn for food, air,
shelter, sex, affiliation, love, self-acceptance, achievement, power, mastery,
self-actualization, etc. Those needs increase our motivation in various
specific, usually positive directions. Moreover, there are drives and emotions
that push us in many negative directions, such as feelings of inferiority that
become self-fulfilling prophecies, desires to avoid responsibility and success,
beliefs that we do not deserve success, self-defeating rebellion against doing
what we are pressured to do, tendencies to avoid any self-evaluation, and, of
course, greed, hatred, and other self-destructive or self-defeating drives. All
of us try to generally increase our desired motivations and/or to reduce our
negative motivations.
While
the power of our physiological and conditioned drives are
undeniable, we must remember that by deciding and declaring "By God, I'm
going to _______ (get a 3.5 GPA, get a divorce, start jogging, stop
drinking...)" we have created our own powerful motivator. Likewise, by
amassing lots of good reasons for changing we have created another powerful set
of motives. If we are determined to change in some specific way, our task is to
maximize the positive, pleasurable motivations and reasons for doing the
desired behavior and to, likewise, maximize the negative, painful factors
associated with continuing the unwanted behavior, i.e. failing to change. Once
determined to change, most people can either "just do it" or they can
easily read chapters 4 and 11, and find ways (methods) to get where they want
to go. It seems to be necessary to believe we can probably accomplish the
change we want, while at the same time we are scared of what will happen if we
fail to change.
Recent
theories (Cantor, Markus, Niedenthal & Nurius, 1986) suggest that our
notions of what is possible play a major role in motivation. Our self-concept
contains many "possible selves:" "I could become"
selves, "I'd like to become" selves, "I should
become" selves, and "I'm afraid of becoming" selves.
These possible selves reflect and influence our "life goals" and, at
the same time, our progress toward our life goals alters our possible selves.
Thus, parts of our selves are constantly changing (even though the total self
is pretty constant). Our current and possible selves and our personal plans
change our behavior in complex ways. For example, on the same exam, why does
good student A set high goals and study hard, while good student B expects to
fail and works frantically, and good student C blows off studying altogether?
All three want to achieve and have been successful. Their different possible
selves may explain the differences in their attitudes and behaviors.
Student A is an "optimist," expects to do well, and works hard to meet or beat his/her past achievements.
Student B is a "pessimist," fears careless failure, overlooks past successes, and predicts doom to soften the blow when it comes. He/she tries real hard to avoid all the awful outcomes he/she is imagining.
Student C is a "self-handicapper" who wants to impress others but fears getting an average score which would tarnish his/her image of being brilliant, so he/she hopes to do fairly well on the exam while letting everyone know he/she hasn't studied, thus, preserving the image of being real smart.
We
don't yet know why people use different strategies, but surely we can learn to
change our thinking about our possible selves and our future, thus, changing
our achievement motivation.
Likewise,
different possible selves may explain why three people, all interested in
socializing with the opposite sex, might behave very differently, e.g. one goes
to parties or the bars every night, another only goes to places where he/she
already knows people, and a third doesn't go out at all. There are many
possible selves involved: "I'm attractive," "I'm
unattractive," "I'm shy," "I'm not likely to meet anyone
interesting," "All they are interested in is sex," "I'd
like to be the center of attention," "I can drink and have fun
anywhere," "I don't want to look like I'm on the make or loose,"
"I don't want to be seen out alone," etc. We can change our self-concept,
then our behavior (or the reverse, see method #5).
The
nature of a "weak will" seems to involve a conflict between (a) being
willing, for complex reasons in specific situations, to do the work and make
the sacrifices necessary to succeed and (b) resisting making the effort,
especially if we can excuse or con ourselves into believing that it is okay not
to try very hard. "I have no will power" is a cop out. See the
discussion of procrastination in chapter 4.
Probably
one-third to one-half of all students have the intellectual ability, under
current conditions, to be "A" students, but two-thirds of these
potential "A" students are not willing to compete and do the
necessary work. Likewise, one-third of us have the musical talent to play in a
band, but most of us don't practice enough. We could play a sport well or have
great knowledge of history or know hundreds of jokes or.... We know how to
achieve these objectives, we just don't want to badly enough, there are other
things we would rather do.
So,
there are several critical aspects of self-directed motivation: One is
deciding what you value--what you want to achieve--and how much you are
willing to invest to be successful. Second is making a commitment to
change, which includes arranging and recognizing the wonderful pay offs of
changing and the terrible disappointments of failing to change (see step 4). Third
is giving up the old way of behaving and deciding how--step by
step--to accomplish the goals you value highly. This requires
self-discipline, self-control, scheduling, practice,
and reinforcement (see chapters 4 and 11).
If,
on the other hand, you decide you would sort-of-like-to change, that is you
have some high, maybe even noble aspiration but never get much accomplished in
that direction, you may simply be enjoying having the goal but living a lie.
Example: the person who wants to be a music or sport star but only practices
for 15 minutes two or three times a week. The pleasurable fantasy is there and
they tell everyone "I want to be really good" but the commitment and
passion are not there. Most likely, such a person will never muster the drive
or motivation to get "over the hump" that stands in the way of all goals.
Here we only deal with that one crucial factor--mustering up the motivation.
Purposes
Steps
STEP ONE: Decide what you really want to accomplish. What price are you willing to pay? Deal with early distractions and your own resistance.
Within
the context of having many motives, there are two fundamental needs for many of
us: (a) the need to achieve and (b) the need for social affiliation or love.
Ordinarily, the latter provides its own motivation or drive, but it is not
uncommon for someone who truly wants to achieve some distant goal, e.g. become
a doctor, to find it very difficult to give up partying, hanging around with
friends, listening to music, watching TV, playing sports, etc. We want to have
it all. But often we can't. So, the first question is: "Is there anything
you are willing to throw yourself into, to sacrifice for?"
If
your answer is "no," it is not something to feel guilty about. For
example, I have heard powerful arguments that it is better to personally and
directly help friends right now than to strive to excel in the future as a
psychologist or to develop "the best" department or to write a book.
There are many good ways to live. Being overly competitive--always trying to
beat the competition and excel--may not be the ideal life style (Kohn, 1986).
Likewise, there are tolerant ways of looking at a low or moderate need to
achieve: perhaps you are still maturing psychologically and need love and
attention from friends or a lover more than anything else at this time (see
Maslow's theories in chapter 4). Perhaps you need to build your own self-esteem
before you can devote yourself to others and a career. Perhaps you correctly
realize your limitations and/or prefer to live at a leisurely pace. We don't
all have to be high achievers.
If
your answer is "yes, I would make many sacrifices in order
to________," you probably already know what you need to do (by noting what
other successful persons have done). Becoming highly motivated isn't easy, if
it doesn't come naturally to you. But it is possible. I've seen many students
change and devote themselves to a career, to studying, to taking charge of
their life. Here are some things to do to heighten your motivation:
Altogether,
these ideas boil down to--learn self-discipline. A critical part of discipline
is learning to postpone pleasures and stick with the job until it is done. You
must be able to envision the desired pay offs in the future but stay steady,
organized, and dependable along the way.
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